| Jon: Hi, there... I'm Jon Arbuckle. I'm a cartoonist, and this is my cat, Garfield. Garfield: Hi, there. I'm Garfield. I'm a cat, and this is my cartoonist, Jon. Jon: Our only thought is to entertain you. Garfield: Feed me. Джон: Привет... Я Джон Арбакл, и я карикатурист. А это мой кот Гарфилд Гарфилд: Привет! Я Гарфилд, и я кот. А это мой карикатурист Джон Джон: Наша единственная цель - развлекать вас Гарфилд: Покорми меня
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| Garfield: Happy birthday, Garfield. I have a surprise for you Jon: A rubber mousey! Garfield: could've used a little salt...
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| jon: I'm putting you on a diet, garfield... here's your dinner. jon: wha...
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| jon: Don't be cruel, garfield. Put the catburger out of its misery and eat it.
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| garfield: cats... garfield: we cat's are intelligent, soft, cute... garfield: furry cuddly... garfield: playful... garfield: demure... garfield: and masters of the house.
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| jon: here, garfield, ...beg. jon: Eeyouch!! Garfield: Groveling is not one of my strong suits
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| jon: this is it, garfield. The late-late movie with brigitte bardot jon: Got our soda pop. Got our popcorn. We're set.
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| garfield: I hate static electricity.
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| *Itch scratch scratch* *Scratch! Scratch! Scratch! Scratch! Itch Scratch! Scratch! Scratch! Scratch!* Garfield: AARRRGH!
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| garfield: Steak! Garfield: Banza! Jon: Garfield! Garfield: Even a house cat has to forage for himself once in a while
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| garfield: love a cookout garfield: mind if I smoke?
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| jon: you're going to love this move, garfield. it's my all-time favorite jon: now here's where lieutenant lacroix finds a spot of blood on the butler's sleeve... so he figures, «ahh! This guy is acting very suspicious
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| Jon: Garfield! Bath time! Garfield? Garfield: You do what you have to
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| Jon: Good news, Garfield! The administration says the rate of inflation is going down. Garfield: That and a buck-fifty will get you a cup of coffee.
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| garfield: oh boy, oh boy. Today is thursday and that's lasagna day. Garfield: cat food!
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| garfield: tickle, tickle, garfield: tickle-tickle-tickle! Garfield: I think I'm going to throw up.
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| garfield: yawn jon: hello, doctor?... My cat's stuck in a stretch.
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| Jon: Garfield, you're a fat, arrogant, lazy pig Garfield: Well, excuuuuuse me!
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| Jon: Garfield, cut that out!
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| Jon: Garfield, you should really learn to control your temper
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| jon: now where could my pipe be? Jon:Garfield!!
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| *Pook!* *Чпок!*
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| jon: heh, heh, heh, jon: a cat who likes mickey mouse garfield: shake it, Annette
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| Jon: don't try looking cute at me, garfield, you still cant have any of my steak
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| garfield: one last olive
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| Garfield: One word about curiosity killing the cat, and I'll break your face
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| gafield: Nothing to do today but hang on the screen door.... garfield: I'm bored Garfield: Bored, bored, bored, bored. Garfiedl: bored, bored, bored, bored, bored, bored, bored, bored,bored. garfield: I wish something would happen Jon: Garfield! Lunch time!!! Garfield: Im in pain... pain, pain. pain, pain, pain.
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| Jon: Heh, heh, heh. Cats just love to play with water Garfield: Whew! I thought I'd never find Jon's watch Джон: Хе, хе, хе *Плюх плюх плюх* Джон: Кошки просто обожают играть с водой Гарфилд: Фух! Я уже думал, что никогда не найду часы Джона
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| *Dab dab dab dab* *Splash splash splash splash splash* Jon: My chicken soup! Garfield: The devil made me do it
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| jon: help yourself to the lasagna Garfield
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| jon: Your're getting a little chunky there, pal jon: I'm thinking of putting you on a diet garfield. Garfield: diet! Garfield: I'm already feeling weak! Garfield: food I need food! Garfield: The room's growing dim!
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| jon: garfield, as of this minute, I'm putting you on a diet Jon: Garfield? Jon: I think I snapped his mind
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| jon: Come on, old Buddy, going on a diet's not all that bad. Why. Why, a couple of pounds off the middle and you'll be fir and trim again. jon: that's better jon: I didn't have the heart to tell him he's made the weight watcher's ten most wanted list
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| jon: let's see how well you've done on your diet this week, Garfield jon: Now where's the bathroom scale Garfield: I'm sitting on it
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| jon: hee-hee-hee jon: ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha
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| Radio: And that's all for mystery theater. ...good night. *CLICK CLICK* Jon: GARFIELD! CUT THAT OUT! Радио: На этом наша рубрика про мистику закончена. ...спокойной ночи *ЩЁЛК ЩЁЛК* Джон: ГАРФИЛД! ПРЕКРАЩАЙ!
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| Jon: Hmmmmm *SMACK!*
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| garfield: purrrr! Jon: have some lasagna, garfield...
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| jon: Garfield, get out of the trash
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| Garfield: Darn bugs Jon: Thanks. I needed that
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| jon: somehow, they always know
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| jon: hey, garfield. Meet hondo the puppet. jon: hi, Garfield. You're sure fat! ha-ha-ha!
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| Garfield: Z. Snort. Uh-oh! *Oh ow eep ipp ooh aah ooch*
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| jon: Garfield! Time to eat! Garfield: O hate modays
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| Jon: suprise, Garfield! Garfield: Oh boy, a scratching post *FWING!* *Scratch scratch scratch scratch scratch scratch scratch scratch scratch scratch scratch scratch scratch scratch scratch* Garfield: It wasn't the living room drapes, but I'll give it a seven
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| Jon: good morning, Garfield. Today we're going to learn to walk on a leash *KABONKA BONKA BONKA* *ROWRR!* Man: I tell you, Thelma. This neighborhood is getting weirder by the minute
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| Jon: Ever thought of walking AROUND the furniture?
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