| Jon: A mouse! Get it! Garfield! You did'nt even try! Garfield: show me a good mouser, and i'll show you a cat with a bad breath
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| Garfield: Ahhhhh... Happiness is a warm television set
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| garfield: we cats like to sit in high places. It reinforces our superiority. Garfield: help
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| garfield: Garfield, you dummy.
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| garfield: All I ever do is eat and sleep eat and sleep eat and sleep. Garfield: There must be more to a cat's life than that. Garfield: But, I hope not.
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| garfield: I'm out of shape. Garfield: I think I'll take up jogging. garfield: Whew! Made it.
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| *SNIFF!* Garfield: Cat food... The bouquet leaves something to be desired
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| garfield: ah, a curtain upon which to sharpen my claws. Garfield: I hate double knit.
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| garfield: dear garfield: Believe it or not, I am an ugly kitten! oh, I do all the things «cute» kittens do... play with yarn and such, but I don't get any attention. I can I do? Garfield: dear «mud": you're trying too hard to be cute. You'll get more attention if you just be yourself... garfield: and sharpen your claws on the living room drapes.
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| Garfield: hmmmm... a new sofa Garfield: much better
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| garfield: I'm getting lazy. It would do me good to get some exercise. Garfield: Much better
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| garfield: I'm going to take an active part in energy conservation. Garfield: get on your mark, get set... Garfield: Conserve
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| garfield: I'm just your average ordinary cat... garfield: for instance, I'm crazy about nature's most perfect food... garfield: Lasagna!
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| garfield: this is the life. I don't think I'll ever get out of bed again. Garfield: I'm hungry.
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| garfield: girl scouts like me. Garfield: I amuse them
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| garfield: oops. I got a scratch on jon's favorite chair garfield: maybe he won't notice
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| Garfield: So I'm on a diet... Big deal. You know what a «diet» is, don't you? It's «die» with a «t», that's what it is!
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| garfield: wax! Garfield: everything tastes good when you're on a diet
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| garfield: Labor day, shmabor day. What a dumb day. Garfield: to hire some jerk, then send him away... garfield: to celebrate work by playing all day.
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| Garfield: Leg cramps
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| garfield: I hate summer garfield: the unberable heat, sticky car seats, hay fever seasons and scorched lawns... garfield: Not to mention curdled kitty munchies
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| garfield: ahem...mee,mee,mee man: shaddup, you stupid cat! Garfield: Tom seaver, Eat your heart out.
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| *YAWN* Garfield: That floor sure looks could this morning. Better Not risk it
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| Garfield: I'm not getting out off bed in the floor is cold. It's freezing! Good
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| Garfield: I couldn't face life as a declawed person so I'll just stick my head in the oven and end it all. Stupid electric stove
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| Garfield: I hate november. Lifeless trees bleak afternoons, raw winds... Icy sandboxes
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| *Kaboing! Kaboing! Kaboing!* *Kaboing! Kaboing! Kaboing! Kaboing!* Garfield: Food's fun!
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| Garfield: Some people have anxiety attacks, some people have gas attacks. I have nap attacks *Zzzzz*
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| Garfield: NAP ATTACK! *CRASH!* Garfield: Whoever thought a nap attack could hurt?
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| Garfield: See, I'd love to stay in bed all day, but I gotta eat sometime *BUZZ SAW SAW scratch scratch CUT CUT BZZZ*
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| Garfield: Oh-oh. I feel a nap attack coming on. Turtles have got it knocked
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| Garfield: Cat's need a balanced diet. Meat, eggs, fruit, bread, vegetables... And an occasional boston fern for dessert
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| Garfield: Let's see... The piano, book shelves, bench, floor... Nope, I think I'll go with the chest, chair, hassock, floor Гарфилд: Посмотрим... Пианино, книжные полки, скамейка, пол... Нет, думаю, я пойду так: комод, кресло, пуфик, пол
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| Garfield: Ahhh, six a.m. This is my favorite time of day. For sleep
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| Garfield: I'm basically your neat cat. *CRASH!* Garfield: I like to keep my windowsill tidy
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| Garfield: Oh doe! *Sniff* Garfield: I thig I hab a code. *Sniff* Garfield: Loog.. Eben my throughts are stuffed ub Гарфилд: О дет! *шмыг* Гарфилд: Кажется, я пдостудился. Сботгите... Даже у боих быслей заложен дос
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| Garfield: You know, maybe there's more to life than just eating and sleeping... Maybe I should be more sondierate of other people's feelings nicer to odie and more generous. Nah
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| Garfield: Scratching posts, balls of yarn and rubber mousies are okay. But when it comes to REALLY NEAT playthings... Give me a christmas tree!
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| garfield: this is my very first christmas garfield: I hope you have a loved one to spend today with because I do garfield: It's you. Merry christmas
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| garfield: I love fridays garfield: The end of the long work week, the beginnings of a weekend filled with relaxation, tv sports and parties garfield: Almost makes me wish I had a job
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| *POW!* *ЧПОК!*
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| garfield: Do you know why I don't like warm milk? Garfield: try this... drink a bowel of warm millk garfield: Then, never brush your teeth again
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| garfield: Why is it all us cats are stereotyped? garfield: «all cats love milk, hate dogs, love mice» etc., etc., etc garfield: Sometimes I get so made I could just kick my gucci scratching post
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| Garfield: Ahhh *CRASH!* Garfield: Face it, garfield. Windowsills just aren't built for us queen sized felines
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| Garfield: I hate cold floors in the morning. Nobody likes cold floors. But we cats have to put twice as many feet on them Гарфилд: Ненавижу холодные полы по утрам. Никто не любит холодные полы. Но мы, кошки, ставим на них вдвое больше ног, чем вы
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| Jon: Garfield! Get off the Piano! Garfield: Talk about stifling one's creative talents Джон: ГАРФИЛД! А ну слезь с пианино! Гарфилд: А вот и притеснение творческих талантов
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| Garfield: Sigh. Ho hum. Ever had one of those days when you feel like you've slept and eaten it all?
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| Garfield: Spring is here. The warm spring sun is coaxing trees to bud and flowers to bloom. Fledgling songbirds are testing their lilting voices. Soft spring zephrs are wafting the sweet scent of lilacs. Spring is here. Big, fat hairy deal
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| Garfield: I like spring. The grass is back from its dormancy. The flowers are back from a long winters rest. And the birds are back from Miami Гарфилд: Люблю весну. Трава пробуждается от спячки. Цветы оживают после долгого зимнего сна. И птицы возвращаются из Майами
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| Garfield: Hmmm
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